Me and Daniel

Me and Daniel
Me and my then 8 year old son, 20 years ago.

Monday, 2 February 2015

Odd and Ends

I have an idea for an app that will read all of your emails out loud in the voice of Gilbert Gottfried. I settled on him when it struck me that the voice of Morgan Freeman is over done. I bet even Morgan Freeman is sick of the sound of his own voice...infact, Morgan Freeman is my first subscriber.
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I saw this woman on tv wearing a dress that had a big stupid belt that looked like a row of books, and I thought....."...wtf's the matter with you?"...and then she said,
"I'm a scarf collector?" 
She said it in that way where everything said sounds like a question.
.......oh. sorry. I mean...."sounds like a question?"....
She set women back two hundred years.
 Who collects scarves??? And why are they on tv talking about it? Aren't there more interesting collections we could be hearing about than scarves??
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I think that one of the most despicable things about first world countries is eating contests.
 Way to sock it to Calcutta!
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Speaking of Calcutta, this is a recipe I'd like to try one day:

Beet Patties
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~ some grated beets with most of the moisture squeezed out...there will still be some moisture, but the beets should be as dry as is humanly possible..I mean, short of doing something like...say...putting them in the dryer...just squeeze them vigorously between some paper towels and they should be fine.

Mix together:
~ 2 eggs
~ sprinkle of oats
~ some coconut oil
~ a bit of olive oil
~ feta cheese...put quite a lot of this in....unless you want these to be vegan
~ some sliced up fresh basil

 Mix it all up together and then add the dried, grated beets...get in there with your hands and moosh it all together. (Your hands and fingers will turn purple so don't make these if you're going to be doing something serious and important later on....something for which purple fingers will be frowned on.)

Fry the patties...(before this step you need to ball up portions of the beet mixture, and flatten the balls to form into patties)...in a little olive oil for a few minutes on each side. They should stay together. If they do fall apart you can turn it into ground beet stew.

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Willie Nelson looks like if Pippi Longstocking was an old man.
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This is what I just heard on t.v.:

"Tomorrow on City Line...how to decorate a long narrow room."

...come on people! It's time we moved beyond this drivel! ..at least that's what I keep telling myself.
Then I start thinking about how it actually is that the long narrow room is decorated...and I find myself wondering about what would happen if I ever found myself in a long narrow room with absolutely no idea about where to put the blacklight doodled butterfly poster, or if the couch should go along one of the short walls, or one of the long walls....just how long do the long walls have to be to qualify as a long narrow room... And what about wallpaper? Is that ever okay in any long narrow room? ....I'll never know these things now because I've missed that episode thinking it would be meaningless spittle..
...or, I should say, I'm planning to miss that episode.(?)



8 comments:

  1. If I was Morgan Freeman, I'd totally have my own voice on something and tell people it wasn't me. Or something like that. Or, maybe, Freeman doing Yoda: "A message you must leave, if want me to back you call."

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    1. Or Freeman doing Gottfried! .....Gottfried doing Yoda? The possibilities are endless!

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  2. Hi Eve Funny you should mention Gilbert Gottfried. I have never understood why or how in the hell this man ever made a living out of that horrifying voice. Every time I hear him speak it makes me want to toss the tv out on its tubes! Even worse when I see his face and hear that voice at the same time. But hey he probably made more money than I'll ever see so go figure. Enjoy the moment my dear. "HUGS"

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    1. Lol! Yeah, I could definately use a little of his money, that's for sure! If he infact has any left....I mean, he must have spent a fortune on hair gel....wait a sec....I'm thinking of Pee Wee Herman! I can't place Gottfried in my mind now, in spite of my reference!

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  3. How narrow is your narrow room? Your couch might not fit on the short side. OMG! Now you'll never figure it out! Oh well. Throw in a couple of papasan chairs, some plants, a cat, and call it good. How is your new friend, by the way?

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    1. Hey Jane! My room is so narrow we call it the 'tube'! Any room is great with a papasan chair and plants! My little Reg is still at the vet...almost a week now! He has an upper respiratory infection and is severly malnourished. He's getting antibiotics and pain killers and is eating enough for a bunch of cats, so he should be back on his feet pretty quick here. I hope so anyway. Can't wait to bring him home!

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    2. Nice. I'm glad you found each other. The timing couldn't have been much better. I hope everything goes well and you both are very happy.There's nothing like reading a book with a nice warm cat on your lap, and I'm sure to a cat there's nothing like the nice warm lap of a person reading a book, It's a symbiotic relationship, that between human and cat. It's a good thing.

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  4. I'm beginning to think that my wife is a scarf collector. She has a lot of them. In fact she has a lot of different things that she has a lot of.

    As much as I like to eat, I could never do an eating contest. I'm slow and steady when it comes to eating and I rarely do big quantities at one sitting. Eating contests are pretty disgusting actually.

    Arlee Bird
    A to Z Challenge Co-host
    Tossing It Out

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Comments are most appreciated.